Name: Huge Tuna Melt
Prep time: 10 min
Cook time: 8 min
Total time: 18 min
Yield: 2 servings
Ingredients: 2 cans (5 oz each) olive oil-packed tuna; 3 tbsp mayonnaise; 1 tsp Dijon mustard; 1 stalk celery, finely diced; 2 tbsp red onion, finely diced; 2 tbsp dill pickle, finely diced; 1 tbsp capers, drained and chopped; 1 tsp fresh lemon juice; 1 tbsp fresh dill, chopped; 1/4 tsp kosher salt; 1/4 tsp black pepper; 4 slices thick-sliced rye bread; 3 tbsp softened unsalted butter; 4 oz sharp cheddar, sliced; 1, small ripe tomato, sliced

Huge Tuna Melt

Prep

10m

Cook

Total

18m

Bigly says

Listen to me. The tuna melt. The HUGE tuna melt. The greatest tuna melt in the recorded history of melted cheese on top of tuna salad on top of toasted bread, and there has been a LOT of melted cheese on a LOT of bread on a LOT of tuna salads — I've eaten more tuna melts than any single human currently drawing breath, probably more than anyone in recorded history, it's a gift and a curse — and this one, mine, the one we're doing today, beats them all. Every diner. Every coffee shop. Every sad little airport kiosk that charges you $14 for a tuna melt that's basically a wet napkin between two crackers. A disgrace to sandwiches.

The best tuna melt I ever had was in a gas station in Albuquerque. True story. A man named Ramón ran the grill. He didn't speak. He just nodded, slapped the butter on the rye, pressed the sandwich down with the heel of his hand, and slid it across the counter on a paper plate. I sat in my car. I ate it. I cried. Tough guys do not cry, but I cried. Ramón knew the secret. Ramón knew about the WATER. Most tuna melts are bad because the tuna salad is WET. Wet tuna, soggy bread, ruined afternoon. Other so-called chefs dump in half a cup of mayonnaise like maniacs and call it a day — and what you get is a sandwich that drips down your wrist into your sleeve. We don't do that here.

The secret is three things, and I'm telling you for free — pay attention. One: drain the tuna twice. Twice. Press it in a strainer like you're trying to teach it a lesson. Two: use just enough mayo to bind, not enough to swim. Three: butter the OUTSIDE of the bread before it goes in the pan. Not mayonnaise on the outside, no, do not write to me about it, butter is the answer and it has always been the answer. The food media won't tell you any of this. They want you confused. They want you wet. They want you sad. Not on my watch. Take my word for it.

Ingredients

2 cans (5 oz each)olive oil-packed tuna(oil-packed, not water-packed, water-packed is sad)
3 tbspmayonnaise(real mayo, the kind your grandmother bought)
1 tspDijon mustard
1 stalkcelery, finely diced
2 tbspred onion, finely diced
2 tbspdill pickle, finely diced
1 tbspcapers, drained and chopped
1 tspfresh lemon juice
1 tbspfresh dill, chopped
1/4 tspkosher salt
1/4 tspblack pepper
4 slicesthick-sliced rye bread(good rye, with caraway, none of the sad white-rye nonsense)
3 tbspsoftened unsalted butter
4 ozsharp cheddar, sliced(sharp, not mild, mild cheddar is a betrayal)
1, smallripe tomato, sliced(in season only, never the pale ones)

Steps

1
Drain the tuna in a fine-mesh strainer, pressing gently to release excess oil. Tip into a bowl and flake apart with a fork.
2
Add mayonnaise, Dijon, celery, red onion, pickle, capers, lemon juice, dill, salt, and pepper. Stir until just combined. Taste and adjust — it should be tangy and savory, not swimming in mayo.
3
Butter one side of each slice of bread generously, edge to edge.
4
Build the sandwiches: butter-side down on the counter, then a slice of cheddar, a generous mound of tuna salad, 2 slices of tomato, another slice of cheddar, and the top piece of bread, butter-side up.
5
Heat a large nonstick or cast iron skillet over medium-low heat — patience here, low and slow gets the cheese fully melted before the bread burns.
6
Place sandwiches in the pan and cook 3-4 minutes until the bottom is deep golden brown and the cheese is starting to melt.
7
Flip carefully and cook another 3-4 minutes, pressing lightly with a spatula, until the second side is golden and the cheese is fully melted and oozing.
8
Transfer to a cutting board and let rest 1 minute. Slice on the diagonal and serve immediately with a pickle and chips.

One more thing

This is the sandwich that ends arguments. You make this for somebody having a bad day, the bad day stops — it just stops. The cheese is melting, the rye is crackling, the tuna is tangy and cool against the hot bread, and for about 90 seconds the entire world is okay. That is what a tuna melt is SUPPOSED to do. The diners forgot. The kiosks forgot. We remember. Now go eat.