The Best Patty Melt
Prep
10m
Cook
50m
Total
60m
Bigly says
Sit down for this one. The patty melt. The BEST patty melt. And before we even start, let me say this — the patty melt is not a cheeseburger. It is not a grilled cheese. It is the THIRD THING. It is the secret third sandwich, and most people don't even know it exists. Most people walk through life eating cheeseburgers and grilled cheeses and they have NEVER known the joy of the patty melt. Sad. Tragic. Somebody needs to teach a class. Maybe me. I should teach the class.
Many people don't know this — and I've talked to diner historians, very smart people, they have whole books about diners — but the patty melt was invented in California, in a diner, by a guy named Tiny. True story, possibly. Look it up. I've had people look it up. And Tiny knew. Tiny KNEW. He knew that if you took a smashed beef patty, and you put it between two slices of rye, with Swiss cheese AND caramelized onions, and you grilled it in butter like a grilled cheese — you have created something the universe was not ready for. The Greeks didn't have this. The Romans didn't have this. Pre-pyramid technology this is NOT. This is a 20th-century American masterpiece. It's HISTORIC.
The secret is the onions. The ONIONS. You cook the onions slow. Not medium-high. Not 'until soft.' SLOW. Until they are deep amber, sweet, almost jammy. Most so-called chefs tell you 'caramelize the onions in 10 minutes' and that is a LIE. A bald-faced lie. If your chef tells you ten minutes, find a new chef. Caramelization is a 40-minute project. Embrace the 40 minutes. The neighbor who taught me this lived to be 102. Could be a coincidence. Probably not. Plain and simple.
Ingredients
- 2 largeyellow onions, thinly sliced(yellow, not red, red onions are for salads)
- 5 tbsp, dividedunsalted butter
- 1 tsp, dividedkosher salt
- 1/2 tspblack pepper
- 1/2 lbground beef, 80/20(80/20, not 90/10, fat is flavor)
- 1 tspWorcestershire sauce
- 4 slicesthick-sliced rye bread(with caraway seeds, end of story)
- 4 ozSwiss cheese, sliced(real Swiss, not 'Swiss-style processed slices,' which are a crime)
- 2 tspDijon mustard(optional, but the right answer is yes)
Steps
- 1
Melt 3 tablespoons of butter in a large skillet over medium-low heat. Add the sliced onions and 1/2 teaspoon salt. Stir to coat.
- 2
Cook the onions low and slow, stirring every few minutes, for 35-45 minutes, until they are deep amber, soft, and jammy. If they start sticking, add a splash of water and scrape up the fond. Do not rush this. Transfer to a bowl and wipe out the skillet.
- 3
Divide the ground beef into 2 loose balls. Season with the remaining salt, pepper, and Worcestershire sauce. Do not mash or overwork — keep them loose.
- 4
Heat the same skillet over medium-high heat. When hot, place the beef balls in the pan and immediately press each one flat into a thin oval roughly the size of your rye slices, using a sturdy spatula.
- 5
Cook 2 minutes, undisturbed, until a deep crust forms. Flip and cook another 1 minute. Transfer the patties to a plate.
- 6
Wipe out the skillet again and reduce heat to medium-low. Butter one side of each slice of rye generously with the remaining 2 tablespoons of butter.
- 7
Build the sandwiches: place 2 slices of rye butter-side down in the skillet, top each with a slice of Swiss, a thin spread of Dijon, a patty, a heap of caramelized onions, another slice of Swiss, and a top slice of rye butter-side up.
- 8
Cook 3-4 minutes per side, pressing gently with a spatula, until the rye is deep golden, the cheese is fully melted, and everything is bonded into one architectural marvel.
- 9
Transfer to a cutting board, rest 1 minute, slice on the diagonal, and serve immediately.
One more thing
The patty melt is a sandwich that asks you to slow down. The onions take 40 minutes and there is nothing — NOTHING — you can do to speed them up. And in those 40 minutes, you remember what cooking actually is. It's not 'open box, microwave, complain.' It's heat and patience and butter and a kitchen that smells like a hug. You bite into this thing, the rye crackles, the Swiss stretches, the onions melt, the beef hits — and your day is fixed. Your week is fixed. The 12-minute shortcut crowd can keep their shortcuts. We're doing it right. That's the recipe.
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