The Greatest Queso Dip
Prep
5m
Cook
15m
Total
20m
Bigly says
Sit down for this one. Queso. We're doing queso. THE GREATEST QUESO DIP IN THE HISTORY OF QUESO DIPS, and I'm about to upset some people. Some people are not going to be happy. The Velveeta people — and I have nothing against Velveeta, Velveeta has a job and it does that job, that job is sitting in a pantry for six years and not changing in any way, which is impressive in its own right, like a pyramid — the Velveeta people are going to be UPSET. Because we're not using Velveeta. We're using REAL CHEESE. They're going to send me letters. Bring it on. I welcome it.
Real queso. Real cheese. Melted slowly. With a roux. A ROUX. Scientists — and I've talked to food chemists, very smart people, the smartest — will tell you that what separates a silky queso from a greasy disaster is emulsion, and what gives you emulsion is a properly made roux. Statisticians have run the numbers. The roux WINS. Every time. The roux is what keeps the cheese from breaking, the roux is what holds the milk and fat together, the roux is the difference between a bowl people fight over and a bowl people quietly walk away from. If your chef tells you otherwise, find a new chef.
With the roux, the cheese stays SILKY. The cheese stays SMOOTH. The cheese stays POURABLE for an hour at the table. A guy named Ramón — and Ramón knows queso, Ramón has FORGOTTEN more about queso than most people will ever know — Ramón tasted this and just nodded. One nod. That's all you get from Ramón. And one nod from Ramón is worth a thousand reviews from the so-called food press. Nobody disputes this. It's just a fact.
Ingredients
- 2 tbspunsalted butter
- 2 tbspall-purpose flour
- 1.5 cupswhole milk(whole milk, do not bring 2% into this house)
- 1/2 cupheavy cream
- 8 ozwhite American cheese, hand-shredded or torn(from the deli counter, not the plastic-wrapped singles)
- 6 ozMonterey Jack cheese, hand-shredded(NEVER pre-shredded — that anti-caking dust is the enemy of melting)
- 1 (4 oz) can, draineddiced green chiles, canned
- 2 tbsppickled jalapeños, chopped
- 1/2 tspground cumin
- 1/2 tspgarlic powder
- 1/4 tspsmoked paprika
- 1/2 tsp, or to tastekosher salt
- 1/4 cupfresh tomato, diced (for topping)
- 2 tbspfresh cilantro, chopped (for topping)
- 1 large bagtortilla chips (for serving)
Steps
- 1
Melt the butter in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Whisk in the flour and cook 1-2 minutes, whisking constantly, until pale and bubbly. Do not let it brown.
- 2
Slowly pour in the milk, whisking constantly to prevent lumps. Add the cream and continue whisking until smooth.
- 3
Cook 3-4 minutes, whisking often, until the mixture thickens enough to coat the back of a spoon.
- 4
Reduce heat to low. Add the cheeses a small handful at a time, stirring after each addition until fully melted before adding more. Patience here — high heat will break the sauce.
- 5
Stir in the green chiles, pickled jalapeños, cumin, garlic powder, and paprika. Taste and season with salt.
- 6
If the queso is too thick, thin with a splash of warm milk until it reaches the consistency you want.
- 7
Transfer to a serving bowl, top with diced tomato and cilantro, and serve immediately with tortilla chips. Keep warm over low heat or in a small slow cooker if serving over time.
One more thing
This is the dip you bring to the party where you want people to remember your name. They will. They will be telling stories about this queso for YEARS. 'Remember when Janet brought that queso? Whatever happened to Janet? She moved away, she opened a queso restaurant, she's a millionaire now.' That's the kind of energy this dip carries. Bring it to the gathering. Bring extra. Bring chips. Bring it ALL. You're welcome.
★ QUESTIONS ABOUT THIS ONE? ★
Ask Bigly about The Greatest Queso Dip.
Substitutions, what to serve it with, why other chefs are wrong about it. He's got opinions.
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